my Dear children (an open letter)

  - February 23rd, 2009 by Shalini Nambiar | Posted in life   14 Comments »

‘Mom, I am now 19 and I think am capable of deciding what to do’, ‘Yes, I think so but you have done well in the CAT exams and you might as well concentrate your energies there’. ‘Mom, you are a writer, an educationist and you have always said follow your dreams so let me tell you , give me two years of my life and I want to do what I feel like doing i.e music’. My heart skipped a beat when I heard Karan, my son tell me this.
The selfish mom in me had taken over and at that moment I was blind of all my teachings and lectures to parents and argued with him as to how important it is to be professional and so on… I knew that what I was saying was falling on deaf ears… .and that night when I reflected on our argument I realized this is what I always advise parents not to do… always telling them to let the child follow his dreams and what was I doing right now… just the opposite… Thus for the first time that night I sat and decided to write a letter to both my children

Dear Tanya and Karan
Probably this is the first time I am writing to you but many things can’t be told but can be written. I know you both are matured enough to understand and do follow it… its a mums advise with all the blessings and good wishes. First and foremost let me tell you that I am very proud of you both. Read the rest of this entry »

Dad I Miss U…

  - December 28th, 2008 by Shalini Nambiar | Posted in life   10 Comments »

I got up in the morning [It was Father’s day] to my children wishing my husband, ‘Happy Father;s Day’ and planning what they should do to make it special for him. My memory was flooded with thoughts of my Dad whom I had lost last year. The memory of his lying on the hospital bed trying to speak to us came back. When he was alive he would say, ‘Come and sit down I want to talk to you, why are you always so busy?’… but I was always hard pressed for time or didn’t take it seriously not realizing the God has strange ways of making you realize things. I never realized that very soon he will not have the time to speak to me. Very often we take things for granted.

When he was lying on the hospital bed after his fall in the bathroom, he  went into coma… he had lost his voice and one could see that pained look in his eyes of wanting to tell me and my sister a lot of things but he couldn’t… he was only able to move his one hand and the painful look of despair in his eyes was all that we saw for 13 days he was bedridden. Dad stayed in the hospital and his condition quickly deteriorated. The value of that breath which we take each day… I realized when we saw him struggling to breathe. Read the rest of this entry »

My Experience As A Parent Seeking Admission…

  - October 15th, 2008 by Shalini Nambiar | Posted in life   13 Comments »

‘What did you have for breakfast today, Little child’?’ asked the Principal sitting on the table with 5 other people to my Daughter. Tanya looked here and there, fiddling with her fingers, looked down, then looked at me for a reassuring feeling and just ran out. ‘I am sorry. Mr and Mrs Nambiar, your child lacks confidence’ wow! what an answer… NEXT…

Next School, ‘So you are not well’, can you sing a nursery rhyme for us, ‘ Tanya screamed, No, I wont and ran out. Reached back home with a feeling of failure, a feeling which I never felt when I had not done well in my Hindi Paper in Grade X. Feeling of shame as if I have failed my daughter.

Next school the next day, Principal glared at us from behind his spectacles, ‘So what do you earn?’ ‘Sir, I am looking to admit my daughter for Nursery, How does it make a difference with what I earn,’ ‘Ok, Ok, where do you work?’ ‘I am a housewife and spend the whole time with my daughter’. Actually Mrs. Nambiar we are sorry the school policy is we prefer working mothers. Read the rest of this entry »

A token of Appreciation for Teachers!!

  - September 6th, 2008 by Shalini Nambiar | Posted in Teachers   20 Comments »

On this Teacher’s day, when the role of the teacher is recognized as a noble and honorable profession, it is important to remember how easily we affect the lives of our children. I know that a teacher meets a challenge each and everyday in his or her classroom. Please accept this small token of appreciation for your significant contribution to the lives of the children.
The dream begins with a teacher who believes in you, who tugs and pushes and leads you to the next plateau, sometimes poking you with a sharp stick called “truth.”

We are heading into an age in which jobs are likely to be invented and made obsolete faster and faster. The chances of today’s college kids working in the same jobs for the same companies for their whole careers are about zero. In such an age, the greatest survival skill you can have is the ability to learn how to learn. The best way to learn how to learn is to love to learn, and the best way to love to learn is to have great teachers who inspire. Read the rest of this entry »

Are U and Me Free ????

  - August 16th, 2008 by Shalini Nambiar | Posted in life   6 Comments »


Freedom… yup, it sounds like so much of mental relief to say that word. Freedom…yes the word in itself is exciting. A word powered by positive vibes, energy and liveliness.

The first thought that comes to my mind on using this word is… freedom from what??? …

I often question myself am I free… free to do what I feel like… free to get wet in the to hug someone… free to tell someone I love u… free to run to that last corner of the world…free to just not do anything… free to eat anything without bothering how much weight I will put on… free to love whoever I want to… free to fall in love… free to just run backwards… free to do things which I dream of…

Well!!! certainly I am not free… I am chained… all the time… by society… which ironically is my creation… by my loved ones… by my management… by my colleagues… by my neighbours… by my monetary condition… by my teenage children… by what others think… the list is endless…

Yes, when we talk of freedom most of us right from childhood have understood it in the patriotic way… yes… there we are free… free from foreign hands… but am I in my individual capacity free ??? Read the rest of this entry »

We are all capable of making mistakes – My classroom experience!

  - July 11th, 2008 by Shalini Nambiar | Posted in My Classroom Experiences   19 Comments »

I have been getting a lot of mails where teachers have asked me to share my experience as a teacher. I felt like writing and talking about a profession which I love and which is my passion and while writing this article the thought which was coming to my mind was of all the unknown teachers across the country who go to work everyday, hardly noticed, rarely appreciated, dedicating their lives to the children who are our future. I would be starting now a series of my experiences in the classroom which many teachers would be able to relate to very easily as theses are the situations we face everyday and you will be able to identify atleast one student in your classroom with the particular character I pick up.

I’m again relating real classroom incidents which occurred during my teaching times where I would always try and discover a solution to them through my instinct and intuition without demeaning the child’s self esteem.

Well, let me tell you teaching is a profession of passion and if you can make a difference to even one child in a class… your mission is accomplished.
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Reflections!!! Humans understand the language of silence and love

  - June 28th, 2008 by Shalini Nambiar | Posted in General   7 Comments »

Reading an article on another Blog prompted me to write about my visit to the Mother Teresa’s  Old age home, nestled at Chhatrapur, New Delhi.

My first trip to this happened by accident…  was looking to visit some Friend’s farm house and landed at this place. It required immense intrinsic courage to enter that place…  I had never visited any place like that…  had probably never faced the harsh realities of life…  didn’t know such things happen had only read about them in the newspaper. I was dressed in salwar kameej and my favourite silver bangles and on my forehead adorned a long bindi…  The minute I entered…  these frail souls all gathered and wanted to touch me, feel me, touch my bangles, could see the glow on their faces when my bangles made that tingling sound. They touched me all over as if I was from an alien world. It dawned on me they had had no visitor since long… they all shared a common bond… REJECTION…..Nobody cared…..I left the place in a hurry promising myself to return again with something for them…  left with eyes brimming with tears……..and one thing which I noticed was there were more women there than men….

Woman… laxmi… mother… sister… the same woman must have spent sleepless nights to bring the little one to life….bore him or her for nine months in her womb… gone through the labour pain….and spent sleepless nights to feed her child…  to be with them at all times.. and this is her fate… reminds me of those famous lines…  ‘Abala teri yehi kahani…..chaati main hai doodh aur ankhon main hai paani… ‘
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I love you Mom

  - June 3rd, 2008 by Shalini Nambiar | Posted in General   27 Comments »

I love you Mom…

‘Mom, Please trust us .we are with you in this time of crisis’. Me and my sister sat across my mom trying to convince her . We could sense her feeling of disbelief and distrust as she glared at us through her glasses. The meaning was clear she no longer trusted us… sometimes it felt that she has forgotten we were her children….

I frequently had my little chats with God as to what had happened to my Mom… She had changed after papa’s death last year.

The same woman who would sit late in the night to knit me the most beautiful sweater which I wanted to wear the next day for my school weekend party… the same woman who will give me milk at 0300 am , who would spend sleepless nights during my board exams. Who will not sleep just to make sure that she was able to wake us up at odd hours for our studies during examination time.

I dedicate this article to that mother who now after so many years looks at us with disbelief and does not trust us. Read the rest of this entry »

Unleashing The Child Within

  - April 29th, 2008 by Shalini Nambiar | Posted in General   8 Comments »

Each of us has a little child residing within ourselves. This little child has been with us all along, even through our adult lives. The “little you” has been another voice from within yourself that has guided and directed you in many areas of your life.

It makes me think about how children are free to associate and create in such imaginative and innocent ways. Ways in which we adults have abandoned or surrendered either through society’s demands to conform to certain rules, or through that slow fade away that happens when as least suspect- even though we swore to never part with our creative innocence and sense of wonder about the world around. Children have a freedom about them that is unfettered by experience, philosophies, and the rigors of the world, an innocence that we as adults so often envy, or wish we could access.

How sad it is that becoming an adult means leaving these things behind.. While dealing with children in the classroom I’m so overtaken by their innocence, their ability to say what they want to ……I really miss it .
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Being alone in a crowd

  - April 14th, 2008 by Shalini Nambiar | Posted in General   19 Comments »

Have you ever felt than tingling sensation when you are in a crowd and still lonely !!!! Have you ever experienced when people around you are talking to you …you are hearing but not listening…you are physically present but mentally far away !!!!!! Sometimes that feeling of emptiness when you feel nobody is listening to you !!!!!!!

Being lonely means – I am not able to share my deepest thoughts with anyone. I have issues at home. I have issues at my office. I have issues with my relatives. I have issues with my friends.Mother-in-law……… I am carrying so much of hurt and guilt inside me. I want to do many things, and at times, I need help. I don’t know ,who to ask? I feel lonely. I feel all alone. I feel that no one understands me. Despite all my trials, I fail to share and convey my feelings

Many of you might not agree but I’ve always felt that sometimes loneliness is necessary and an healthy part of life. I don’t know where I came up with that.

I have friends with whom I try to talk about my problems. But they want to tell me theirs first. What is taken quite seriously by me, is considered ordinary by others. What do I do? How will that help? My character, and my thinking. Is something wrong with them? Who will tell me? Who will guide? I feel very disturbed at all the times. I want peace in my mind. I go out to walk alone, but my thoughts don’t leave me anywhere. This agitation of my mind is becoming intolerable. I feel lonely. I want to talk with someone who will understand my point of view and tell me what to do? Read the rest of this entry »

  • Shalini Nambiar,

     Shalini Nambiar